As I Hear The Rain, I Ponder…

It’s raining today. I am hearing the raindrops hit the balcony rail. It’s bringing back memories of when it all began.

Over a decade ago, on a dark rainy night, I was listening to the rain hit the window sill as inspiration washed over me. And I wrote like I’ve never written before. It continued for years. Went into slumber for a while, but never truly stopped.

I’ve always liked rain. Maybe never truly understood how much, until it was all I had. Living far away from home with no winter, autumn, or spring to enjoy anymore. Not even warm summer days without feeling like I’m melting. And certainly no cool summer nights and the fresh scent of dew.

It’s different here. Imperfect, yet so beautiful. Even if it’s under the same sky as the rest of the world. Being far away from home has taught me a lot.

Where do I even begin?

I’ve learned so much about the world. Myself. I stepped into a dream and wondered when I’ll wake up. And wake up I did. Fell asleep again. Hypnotized by the everyday life of the modern societies.

Or should I say… western societies?

My dreams got invaded. I thought I should be doing something else than I had truly desired. But I can always count on my soul to wake me up and remind me of what truly matters.

Regardless, leaving home was the best decision I’ve ever made. Likely, I wouldn’t have known what I know now. An invaluable piece of myself could’ve been buried deep and hidden in a toxic haze.

Of course, so many things are far from perfect. But perfection doesn’t really exist, does it?

Maybe it’s ironic, but exactly where I feel the safest, I need to be the most brave. When so many, especially those closest to me, would rather stay asleep.

No matter what, I wouldn’t change a thing about how my life has turned out, but I’d lie if I said I never wanted to.

In the end, all my wishes and the things around me are just a part of my human experience.

And right now, my biggest desire is…

Peace.

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